General Chat

Doctor LL take the shame, have a nice fry up, you'll feel better, honest!! Some of these new members hav'nt reported to sickbay for their pricks yet, and they are jumping each other left right and centre, I've had to bar them from the brothel. Lady Anne

Good Morning All, ASSISTANT COOK: The breakfast Menu is posted the night before. Should the Admiral, Dr Legs or Security Dave the croc hunter or any of the paying passengers (that does not include the brothel or its inmates) require anything that is not on the Menu a message shall be slipped under the Galley door the night before. Breakfast starts at 7:00 ends at 9:00 Lunch: from 13:00 to 14:00 Dinner :from 19:00 to 21:00 Except Sundays: Late full English breakfast due to hangovers etc. Late: Sunday Roast with all the trimmings. Dinner cold meats and salad. Remember your position you "sassy" assistant! If I can wash dishes so can you. That is until Dr Legs can find a dishwasher assistant to the assistant cook. "Sassy" Assistant get yourself down to the kitchen poste haste as you are need to cook the rice, I said rice loose grains and not a lumpy glue. FAT LADY,COOK

Sorry used all the rice for the sushi last night. Can you substitute with something else? Chips sounds good! By the way "master" you will have to cook it yourself as I am off to bed now. I'm on night shift. I will prep the food for you while you are having your much much needed beauty sleep. Do I get any overtime because I worked 12 hours straight? Deb - your galley slave

FOR ATTENTION: DR LEGS. It has come to my attention that the "Sassy" assistant cook is also a Karaoke singer. I am afraid it would be impossible for her to do both jobs as the "Sassy" assistant cannot be on call twenty four hours a day. Please discuss her position with the Admiral as I still need a dishwasher (would suit her perfectly) and an assistant cook. FAT LADY, COOK

Would someone run the bar for me today? The Black Widow and I intend to do some serious drinking and the Brandy is ours! Oi, Black Widow, Shake a leg/shift you butt! I'm halfway through the first bottle,hic! Cheers Viv the A.L.

Attention Please People Bingo will start today 11.15 We will be playing for 1 line. The Jackpot is once again 100 Euros! You gotta be innit to win it!!! Steph EM

Black Widow, if Mel is wearing a kilt beware the doctors wrath! Don't worry about Pat I've stuck him in the hold until nurse glady's can zoom in and give him a little prick.lol bryan Lady Anne

okay Black widow,lol don't say I did'nt warn you, hope you hav'nt bitten off more than you can chew! Would'nt you like to come down and earn money, one can never have enough you know? You might just be able to fill Slutty Jeans position - missing her a lot, by the way. Lady Anne

Gwynne so it was your shoes i fell over in the dark last night, sorry i got a bit cross and slung them over board, if your lucky you might find them in one of the lifeboats as i did'nt hear a splash. Must get down to the galley sounds like trouble brewing, could be a lot of skin and hair flying about, now now ladies, remember fat cooks in charge. Frank and Bruno have to be kept locked in my cabin because of that waste of space crocodile, don't want it to eat them, is'nt that a good enough reason to DONK it and turf it over the side, on my rounds and in a bad mood, bruised shins and a thick head, David ( security ) Be Very Very Afraid

lmao Doctor LL

Black Widow, Come and drown your sorrows. I've taken over a comfy corner of the bar with a case of Brandy each, mixers, fags (I gave up years ago) and nibbles. Get your a*se in gear and get down here. Viv A.L.

P.S. Plenty of 'Talent' at the bar! ;-) Viv A.L.

Cheers...glug,glug,glug............ Viv A.L.

Go easy on Teddy he had a hard night down here with the girls! hahahaha

Bingo is about to start- is everyone ready??? i will be calling out 20 numbers-the first person to get a line has to shout BINGO! False claims will lead to......ill decide when it happens! READY???

1st number its two sitting ducks its the number 22- quack quack one little click its the number 6 my age its the number 18 Anyone close? lol

Black widows poo its the number 42 its top of the shots number 90 Two fat cooks its 88 how we going?

ooohhh nearly there its the number 68 and we are there- eat all day and never get fat, your place or mine its the number 69

clickety click number 66 at the bottom number 1 anyone close yet?

I missed the first numbers, can you start again. I've been searching for my red boots so recklessly cast aside by security. The elf is a little quieter now. Gwynne