General Chat

Way back in the mists of time when I was newly wed and was waiting for the arrival of my soldier husband whom I hadn't seen for 3 weeks. There was a knock on the front door I rushed to open it flung my arms round him or so I thought. Then a voice said that was very nice love but Ive only come to collect the window money Then there was the time when I was a proud new mum and one Sunday afternoon was taking the baby to show to my friends It was turning out time at the pub and suddenly my knickers fell down to my feet . You can imagine the ribald comments I got I quickly scooped them up and carried on to my friends knickerless One snowy evening many years later our daft milkman came to collect his money and whilst I was sorting it out he put a snowball down my back and of course I screamed Husband came to investigate and there I was in the arms of the milk man Does this happen often he asked? No we both replied as the milkman beat a quick retreat Later on hubby could see the funny side of it because it was the type of thing he would do himself This one is about my daughter Janette who tries to be very elegant Ha!Ha! but suffers from the terrible complaint of tights that get big holes in them and fall down She works in the local job centre and one day a claimant was taken ill and collapsed so she went to investigate. Wondering why all her workmates were laughing she looked up and there she was on the close circuit tv with her tights round her ankles Bren

And another one! A few years ago I was going to the end of season cricket presentation night so I thought I'd treat myself to a new pair of trousers. They were quite clingy round the bum and you could see a horrible VPL. As I don't get along with thongs I decided to go without knickers. I'd been at the do for a couple of hours when I needed to go to the loo. As I sat there doing what you do, I happened to look down and realised there was a great big hole in my trousers. The seam had come apart from under the zip round to the crotch area. How long had it been like that? Either nobody had noticed or they were too polite to tell me! Needless to say if I go knickerless these days I always carry a pair of pants in my handbag just incase. Jeanette

Mine always seem to involve a lack of underwear! When I was at junior school we used to go swimming at the local high school every Friday morning. As it was the first lesson we always used to put our swimming cossies on under our uniforms and take our undies in our bags to change into afterwards. One particular day I was getting changed after swimming and couldn't find my pants. I turned the changing room upside down looking for them but to no avail. So I had to go home on the coach wearing a short skirt and no knickers. The coach had to drop me off at home on the way back to get another pair. Everybody on the bus knew what the problem was - it was sooooo embarassing. Anyway, when I got back to school I found out that my so called friend had forgotten her knickers and so had knicked mine. I never forgave her for embarassing me so much in front of everyone. Cow! lol Jeanette

Hi Brenda, Day just went too quick, there were a few people I didn't get chance to speak to. My final embarrassing story was not my fault this time (well not entirely!). I was in Germany and had just finished work. I popped along to the train station, where there's a few shops and I first went into a mini mart type place and bought a few odds and ends. Walked out and didn't hear/notice the security alarm go off. I went next door to Germany's equivalent of Boots/Superdrug and set the alarm off in there, except nobody took much notice because there was no one wandering out of the store. I bought a few items, wandered out the store and of course, set the alarm off. This time, the assistant beckoned me over and I tried walking past the alarm again. Same thing happened, so they wanted to look in the rucksack I was carrying. Well, I'd just come from the gym after finishing work and had things like shampoo, deoderant, shower gel rolling around loose in my rucksack, so I was thinking "oh no, it looks like I've nicked them!". Not being able to speak much German, I tried explaining that I'd come from the gym and the containers were half empty anyway. They seemed satisfied with that. A few days later, I'm in a large record store (the equivalent of HMV) and purchase a couple of albums. I pay for them, leave the store and then....beep beep beep....the alarm goes off again to my dismay. The security guard wanted to check my rucksack, and I had forgotten I had a couple of albums in the bottom of the rucksack as I like to listen to music whilst travelling to and from work. What made it worse was that I'd hadn't bothered to take the price tags off them when I originally purchased them. In a bit of a panic, I tried explaining and the guy eventually just grunted and waved me through. However from that point on, I've been wary of setting security alarms off!

Mine was when i was pregnant with my last daughter,,21 years ago,,,I had a terrible wind problem,,,,,very terrible. One afternoon Im sat with the head phones on,,listening to some nice music and relaxing,,eyes closed,,,,hubbie is outside doing stuff to the car,,, The wind starts to churn and bubble,,,,I let out a great big looooooong very loud puff of wind,,and open my eyes so see hubbies brother sat there with his new girlfriend,,,,he'd been sat there for about 20 miniutes during which time i had farted for england,,

my embarrasing stories are too embarrasing for me to print :-P Anna xx

Hi Andy ,and no help from the bunnies either,nice to see you on Tuesday,sorry we did not get to chat ,next time maybe,unless your still of middle aged womenLOL

that completely confused me lol

Another story involving alcohol happened when I was at university (now there's a surprise!). It was during Fresher's week although I was just starting my final year. We'd been out and my mate and I came back together and when we got back, we watched a film and started drinking this bottle of vodka that you can only get in places like Cyprus and so on. A little while later, two of our other housemates (Simon and Ashley) arrived back in a raucous mood and we all congregrated in Simon's room for a chat and a bit of a laugh. Everyone was in the room and I remember sitting on the bed and then the next thing I know, I'm being woken up by Simon (the one whose bedroom we'd been in), except it was dark and there was no one else around. Confused, I suddenly realised I'd gone to sleep and noticed that I appeared to be wearing Simon's t-shirt and shorts that he wore for going to bed!! Waking up the next day, we discussed what had happened. Apparently myself and Ashley had passed out on Simon's bed. Ashley woke up, went back to his room and was joined by Simon. Some time later, Ashley came back downstairs to get something to eat, and was puzzled to see the outline of someone fast asleep in Simon's bed, yet he had just left Simon upstairs in his room! When he got back upstairs, Simon had passed out on his bed and so Ashley turfed him out. Simon came downstairs and then discovered me fast asleep in his bed; I'd gone to sleep thinking I was in my own room! Chaos reigns!!

Camping in Devon we had a spot quite close to the loos. Very convenient. And unisex, just like France. Very modern for England I thought. It wasn't until about the third day that I was politely informed by one of the other users that the gents was on the other side of the site.

My embarrasing stories always seem to involve a certain time of the month! One year me and my family went on a holiday to Wales, I must have been about 16, there I was sitting on a rock in my little bikini trying to catch the eye of any males that walk past (14 years on and I'm still doing the same!) when my brother (2 years older than me) says "Karen youve got a bit of cotton lose on your bikini bottoms" and yep youve guessed it, the cotton wasnt attached to my bikini, it was attached to something else abit more personal! (blush!)

Hi Andy And there you were in Manchester wearing a pair of fluffy rabbit ears sat amongst middle aged ladies sober I think .Although I suppose your water bottle could have contained Vodka , and you do look slightly worse for wear in the piccie I took of you Bren

lolol i like the pop socks message, so funny. Well i have loads but the worst was, when i was 14, i was told i had to be in the school play (i had never said yes as im shy) and i played a flower seller, well as i have crutches and couldnt get on the stage, the teachers put a block at the front of the stage with a chair for me to sit on. They said after my part they would help me move. For the part i had to wear a long skirt and i NEVER wear skirts. So sat down all happy did my part,but after no one came to help, so i stood up, the light went off, i tripped on my skirt and flew into the audience, if that wasnt bad enough, the light then came on and my skirt was around my ankles with my knicks stuck up my bum, a 12 yr old boy stalked me in school for weeks after lol NEVER going near a stage again

I used to work for a large department store. One sunny day a friend and i were walking from the back of the store to the front when i spotted this young well endowed girl who wasn't wearing a bra under her tight top, you could have hung up a few coats! "that's disgusting" says i "it is so obvious she is not wearing a bra, i think that's terrible, you would think that she would know better" Says my friend "that's my sister"

I've got so many but one that comes to mind was when I was leaving a job, many years ago, we were having a girlie night out. A few of us were going for a meal in a very popular chinese restaurant. Half way through the meal I had to go to the ladies. Afterwards, making my way back to my table I could hear giggles, then a group of guys at one table stood up and applauded soon the whole restaurant were applauding. It wasn't 'til one of my friends told me my skirt was stuck firmly in my knickers, that I knew why. And I was wearing stockings and sussies. Agggghhhhhh!

Tracey, I nearly died laughing when i read that. What a picture that must have been. I have many embarrasing moments but one that comes to mind now is walking along the shopping centre and thinking my jeans felt a bit strange. I looked down and noticed something sticking out the bottom and proceeded to try and remove the offending article only to find it was a pair of tights I had been wearing the day before. I pulled and pulled until they eventually all came out. I nearly died and my friend almost wet herself. If i think of any more i'll add them on. Pam :o))

I left home with my three carrier bags, went to the taxi rank and got in the car. "Newcastle please" I asked. I explained to the driver exactly where I wanted to go on the way. We arrived at my destination (6 mile journey) and I asked "how much do I owe you?" His reply........."That's alright love, I was only waiting for my friends to come out of the pub, I'm not a taxi" and that's only one of my embarrassing moments!!!!!!

After visiting friends, I was driving home via a country road, when I was caught short. My son was four at the time and I decided to stop at a roadside cafe to visit the loo. On arriving, a coach tour had just arrived, full of elderly ladies, so I hurried with my son to get to the front of the 'loo queue'. Friendly ladies allowed us to go first, thinking that the need was for my son. Into the cubicle - ahhh relief! Suddenly my son (in a loud voice) said 'Mummy, why do you sit down to wee? I can stand up to wee, why can't you? Try standing up to wee mum, you're a big girl now' Then I had to face the queue of ladies, who were laughing and nodding to each other.... Not to mention the time when I was a student in Aberdeen and shared a flat with three other girls, one of whom was rather well endowed. We used to share clothes and one morning I spotted my flat mates jumper which I coveted! Quickly put it on and set off to get the bus. I thought that the 'admiring' looks were at the beautiful jumper and I smiled at everyone in the bus queue, feeling very pleased with myself. It was only when I got on the bus, the driver said to me 'If I was you, I'd remove that before anyone else gets an eyeful' Puzzled, I sat down and took off the jumper, only to find that my flat mates bra was hooked on to the back of the jumper and had been merrily flapping in the breeze... Di in Sydney

when my son was about 7 he did the most dreadfull thing..... i was in the bathroom, powdering my nose!!!!or something.....there is a knock at the door.....get that will you son i shout down the stairs....ok mum........he opens the door and calls up the stairs.......mum....its that fat lady you dont like..........ever wanted to go round the u bend????/ i did that day......

Ray always has had a habit of walking ahead of me, once walking around a market in Dover I stopped to look at a stall selling underwear, linking arms with him I said "I think I will buy that sexy black bra after all." "And very nice you will look I am sure." came the bemused answer You guessed it. I had linked arms with a perfect stranger.