General Chat

Susan Have sent you a mail Hugs Paul

Susan my heart goes out to you at this sad time i have 3 lovely little boys and they are the best but when i was 17 i lost ababy it wasnt with my husband but by someone else and my mum doesnt ever let me mention it she feels that it should just not be spoke about but my hubby he is great and all though it wasnt his child every may (this is when i miscarried) he lets me cry and talk about what could off been lots of talking about Ellie is the best way and dont worry about what others think you talk about her and cry for her as much as u want ,and although you lost your baby in the neonatal unit those nurses are wonderful people i had 2 born early and spent 2 weeks in there and they were great (hope i didnt offend by talking about the neonatal unit) god bless kylie xxx

Hello Susan, Im so sorry for your loss, I have never been in the situation you have but I did miscarry last year (the third one) and was absoloutly devastated. I have three children already but sadly divorced from their father 3 years ago. I met and married my new husband and he longed for a child so it was an absolute shock when we lost our baby. Im now waiting for test results to see where we go from now but have been told Im probably going to need some kind of fertility treatment. I will be thinking of you for the next few days. Love Julie........p.s. I found a great site that helps me quite alot its called born too soon and they add little cherubs for you on the site with your babys details, it may help xx

Thanks for all your support. At the time it always feels like you are the only one...and of course you are not! Im sure that those of you who have suffered a loss of any person close to them suffers from the same feelings, including the 'why me?'. Unlike some, I am able to look back with fond memories as well as the bad ones of the last 2 days of Ellie's life. We were lucky to have had those good days when so many don't get that chance. I agree totally with Kylie that the staff in the neonatal units are amazing. I certainly couldnt cope with that job, all the highs and lows. They were also amazing when Ellie died, we were given as much time as we wanted with her, and we had our own neonatal nurse that day, looking after us! They are very special people. Sue

i havnt suffered a neonatal death but wen my son kris was born he wasnt expected to live as he had the worst type on meningitus there is we were told to expect the worse it was a terrible time luckily for us and him he did manage to live every year at his birthday i am reminded of how lucky we r depsite the problems he has (epilepsy)that he is here but also sad cus it was such a bad time then you must grieve for ur baby and talk bout her sorry for babling on lou xx

Susan, I am so sorry for your loss. Although not in your situation, our daughter was diagnosed with a heart condition when she was 1 day old- she had an operation at 9 weeks and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do to hand her over to the doctors to perform the operation. i also felt that she was not really 'ours' until just after her first birthday when the doctors felt confident that the op had been a success. Up untril then I was trying to cram in everything I could think of to do with her, as I was convinced we were going to lose her and did not want to waste a second. It is a strange world you inhabit when your child is in hospital, and I feel sorry for you that the outcome was not happy. I hope that things will get better with time.