General Chat

It sounds like he's worried about splitting up or you finding someone else. Trouble is, it's something he has to figure for himself and that will only come with age. There's nothing you can do to help ( I talk from past experience I'm afraid). See if he can talk about it before doing anything drastic though (I don't know what your history is so don't know how much my advice can help). p.s. C.B. Don't mean to offend but, don't believe you've never snapped at your hubby because you've had a bad day, PMT etc. ;-)

all this talk of insecurity, immatiruty... is it possible he's just a *cough* bastard ? Some blokes just treat women like this, verbal and physical abuse... once its started, its best to get shot of him

steedie the fact is that girls think more than boys, are more mature than boys their own age and look further in to the future. the guy probably thinks he should be out on the town doing whatever he wants whenever he wants because he feels tied down. the trouble is he cant stand the thought of you doing the same thing! unfortunatley chick, boys of that age tend to have a great deal of double standards and you're getting the bad side at the moment. theres no point throwing mud either. what you have to do in my humble opinion is look at your life and if its worse with him in it than it was before then get out! you got no kids, no ties like a mortgage or anything. walk away now and find someone who deserves you. lots of love, paul. (ex 21 year old idiot!!!) xxxx

You could be right Paul. He might just be, but I don't know Steph or other half well enough to say. Some men grow up thinking that because dad was that way, they should be too. My sister is with a TW*T of that kind, and I've clocked him in the face on more than one occasion for it! Trouble is, there's only two people who really know. If that's what he is then you should drop him Steedie.

thats the thing though, your gonna all think im so annoying by saying this, but he is so loving, caring, gives me cuddles and sometimes even suffocates me cos it gets too much, its just sometimes he can turn, and be so bloody nasty! xxxx

Steedie,I assume you are young,But you don,t have to put up with it,The World is your "Oyster" Tell him to "Hit The Road" Life is too short to waste it on people like him.Best Wishes, Hal.

Well soft as it is, you can't help who you fall for. We all know that much don't we? Chin up! :-]

Paul H, thats the thing, my has been better since being with him, but dont forget, wheni got with him i had just turned 16...i tell him all the time to go out with friends, but he says no, he would rather be with me, sometimes i phone his mates to come over, and then i go upstairs and watch a dvd, just so he sees his mates, its just a confusing and annoyin situation! xxxx

thats because in his mind he's about 12 and doesnt know if he's coming or going. he wants you then hates you. it really is a certain type of bloke thing. and that type is what paul s is saying. he probably gets satisfaction from how far he can push you and then get forgiveness. i dont know chick. but get things clear before you commit to anything! xx

Craig - how true!!

i know what you mean spendy, and yes, im afraid they are all taken! :-(( xx

steedie your a pretty girl young you have everything goin for ya.i would dump him and find yourself a nice man who will treat you right.take care babe love and hugsxxxxx(:

Steedie I agree with the majority - he has to go. I had one like that - in my previous life - life was good when he wanted, but the slightest thing not as he wanted and he'd sulk, big time. I had been financially supporting him and his daughter whilst he was looking for a new job, which he found and I thought life would just get better from then on. Alas, only a couple of weeks into new job and a major sulking session. So, I confronted him about it when he hadn't spoken to me for two days as I'd had enough. He told me he couldn't handle the pressure I was putting on him. What pressure! I seemed to think it was the other way around. Anyway, decided I wasn't standing for anymore nonesense, so handed in my notice in at work, packed my bags, made a phone call and returned home within the week. Never seen anyone so 'gob-smacked' before and he couldn't understand why. Have to say Steedie, you would be better off without him and there is someone more worthy of you out there. Love and hugs Wendy

Hi Steph, crumbs - you're going through a rough patch, eh? Like someone said just now (sorry, forgotten your name!!) the replies from you fellas on here have been really constructive. Dave sounds a lovely bloke when everything's going his way, but he needs to control himself when things aren't. Why don't you suggest going your separate ways for a while, and that perhaps he should enrol at anger management classes? The people who run them call it "counselling", so there'd be no stigma attached. If he's really serious about you, surely he'd do it. I understand this counselling is very common, and a bloody good idea! It really sounds as if you both need a break from eachother, and that's no slant on you love. You can do without this! (Yeah, like you didn't know that already). And as you can see from the fellas' replies, not all men are like this! Glenys x

Steedie You deserve better than him. Don't get into the situation I got into when I was 17/18.My boyfriend was like yours( not grown up) thought I could change him by giving him loads of love and attention. WE got married had kids and all the time I was getting physically abused because he thought I was giving more attention to the kids than him. Everytime we had a bust up(that he started) he would cry like a baby and say he was sorry and that he didn't know why he did it. Got out of that situation fast and he got married again and he treated his second wife exactly the same. Some men(not all) never grow up. Hope you think long and hard about your predicament before you do anything. I am behind you all the way love no matter what decision you make. Love and Hugs Sue