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Hi all,
I came here as an absolute novice to all this genealogy malarkey, I opened up MY tree to all and sundry, now I'm no thicko, but I was just excited that there might be people out there that would share some part in my family's history. Gullible? Maybe. Excited? Definitely.
We're all quick to do the "It's your own fault, don't share...rah rah rah" but even the most careful can sometimes get dragged into it. Often someone with 40,000 names in their tree is a "collector", it's often a give-away to what they're looking for, so just ask them lots of questions first, to see if there is a connection. Then if you're happy to go ahead, well do it!
Someone who was related to my 10x Gt Grandmother's sister, on my Mum's side, added all my details, including my ex-husband (YES, I do have his permission before I'm asked!!) and all the relatives from my Dad's side...how that could ever be relevant to anyone, I swear I don't know, but I asked them politely if they could remove them, and they did.
Job done.
As I say, I was an utter novice when it came to genealogy, but I learnt the hard way. YES, no-one "owns" my tree - not even me really, but I just find it a bit pointless that they should want that kind of info, if they do, well, whatever.
I am currently receiving messages from someone who is giving me one-line questions - but no answers, and seems to have no idea on how to ask for things politely, no hello's, could you help me, best wishes, thanks for your help... so I'm now going to "politely" ignore him.
I no longer open my tree on request, I ask questions first, and after often many messages later, if there is a DEFINITE connection, then I'll share what I have.
Merry Christmas all!
Heidi
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