Genealogy Chat

Come on then you lot. Have a heart. I know some things are annoying - especially if people post the same query on several boards. But they don't realise there are people who help out and look at all new posts. When I started I went to boards for a particular name and posted on all of them, thinking that only people interested in that name would look! I was told not to do this, but in a polite and considerate way, and never felt intimidated or patronised. I also failed to post back, assuming I would get some kind of message when someone replied.
I am not innocent of being a bit shirty with newcomers myself, but a "thank-you" message I have received has included this:

"i bumped up some old threads so i have been told off for using more than one thread about one person, i genuinly didnt think about this and that it would cause so many problems so i feel really upset that people think i am trying to hog the board or something,
I am so upset I dont think I will ever post a message again, I don't want to be seen as bad because that I am not."

Let's tone it down a bit, what do you say? I mean, no-one makes us do this!

Jan

When is a new member not a new member?

When they have a number lower than mine but still claim to be a newbie !!!

Personally, I blame GR themselves. If you click on the button above which says "How can the Genes Community help me?" there is nothing to help a newbie actually use the boards. Lots of things that you can or can't do but not HOW to use the boards.

However I agree with Glitter Baby that a lot of people who claim to be new actually have membership numbers that would suggest they have been members for quite a long time.

Kath. x

Just saying - follow the old adage "speak as you would like to be spoken to".
Jan

I agree with Kathleen & think GR are a fault

They should never have change the History Board which at one time you could only access if you had that name in your tree

& the TTF wasn't threaded again accessed though that surname, though we could see it in a tab at the top to reply with help it was PM.

Yes - I am one of the "old new" people, a member of a few years but I only posted for the first time yesterday. Why? you may ask, well I felt part of the GR community as I read others comments, but am not really sure about how to use the boards, and I made this known yesterday - just in case I did something wrong.
It is possible to be an old newbie and I would have appreciated reading a step by step "how to" navigate the boards.
Mostly people need to be aware we are a community!
Winterose

Hi Joan

You don't have to be a paid member to create a tree...if someone leaves this site unless they delete their tree then it stays

As we are straying off the point, maybe the issue shiuld be treating everyone with respect? And not scaring of inexperienced members.
Jan

Yes, well, in an ideal world we all read the instructions, but when excited over a new project who does? Not me. And my point is that a lot of oldies can be a bit aggressive.
Jan

Yes Joan your right they do get a number.......I join the site in Jan 2003 but did pay my fiver till June 2003
_______


I think it might be best that people learn & read how the boards work, when i joined i did't know where anything was but it didn't stop me from looking

I stand by what i have said ever since GR change the boards, they should have left them alone
When they 1st change them me & a couple others try to point people in the direction of the Tips & Records board which were the look ups boards to be told in a PM by a "Newbie" to mind my ******* own business
There were 2 boards for look ups it doesn't need 5

If people get a really abusive message, remember that you can report this to Genes.
Jan

Thanks Joan.... but you know me, i just carry on

Janet......i know you can but i had worst said to me so that was nothing.....i didn't take no notice & just carried on with what i was doing

Hi Janet and thank you.

The main fault is with GR in not posting guidelines on how to return to My Threads.




I want to help new folk but don't have access to Ancestry etc. so, when I have time, I pm folk who haven't replied to their threads from the day before. The majority return to me with the point that they had no idea of what to do to find their message again. When I first started using these boards (after having been a member for several years) I trawled up and down the pages looking for the message I had put on!

Many are elderly and some are not computer savvy. There are also some in Oz who post and go to bed because they don't realise that this is a 24.7 site! This has been said to me several times.

I have to say, from what I have learned over the last few months, the lack of response is because of lack of guidelines, not because of lack of manners.

I advise many new folk to complain to GR re their lack of guidelines for finding/receiving replies.


Hey ho.

EDIT - I should also add that many new folk think that they will be advised via email and most are astounded at the speed of the replies!!

Thanks for the input Cynthia, but that is not my point. GR's shortcomings are a separate issue. My point is the unfortunate way inexperienced people are spoken to by certain members on here.
You sound like someone who goes out of your way to help and does not criticise people for things they do not understand. I wish others did the same!
Jan

But Janet you have admiting to doing what you are asking others not to do.

The only thing that i ahve ask people not to do is respect the living people whos details they have plastered on a public forum....which i might also add you don't have to be a full member to read

Just trying to admit I have the same failings! Must do better - and not blame GR. Hopefully not outright nasty though.
Jan

It IS hard as a new member to get it right...even having read for months in advance , I know I upset someone...who is co-incidentally posting here :)) I had asked for a look up and they had kindly helped .... I didn't like to ask them for further help as I felt it would be imposing, so posted asking if anyone else could help lol... realised when they replied that I had made them feel their help was maybe 'not good enough' which was the exact opposite of my intention :(

Without the 'tone' of voice even just a 'straight' statement or query can sound a bit brusque without that intent .

Rose xx

well I hope I am never unpleasant to anyone and always try to help, particularly newbies

I did put up threads on each board "Duplicate postings are a no no" - these brought so much grief and for some reason turned quite nasty I had to delete them

I also put one up which told people to check their postings as they would not receive notification of replies - I added that "we do not want you to miss out"

I ended up deleting them and shan't do it again - only did it to try and help and asked GR if they would sticky them - they said they would consider it, but do I care now? not any more

I shall carry on helping people, pointing out they have added to posts which are years old and advising them how to contact the poster, and sending messages to people to tell them they have replies, but no more postings like those I have deleted - it just isn't worth the grief

Could I add that I have never read GR guidelines - just used common sense and watched what other members did

Definitely agree with Cynthia's note on the non-notification. I've got my own tree website, plus I'm on Facebook and I add things to various consumer review sites and all of those send me an e-mail notification if somebody merely leaves a comment on something I've written (or comments on the same photo that I left a note on, on Facebook), so if somebody accustomed to that level of site interaction comes to this site then I could see why they would expect to get message notifications.

I think the History and Trying to Find things have become a bit confusing since they were made threaded. Before, if you spotted a person who had mentioned one of your relatives in a thread, the only option to get in touch was to send them a message. Now those posts have (for some reason) become threaded, anybody would think - especially if they are new to the site - that the purpose is for related people to get in touch by leaving messages on the same thread.

Maybe it just shows how message boards and community sites have become more interactive since this site was designed?

As Janet has intimated, there are some who feel it is there place to keep others right. Nothing wrong with this if it's done in the right manner but sometimes it is not.

Its likely on first and subsequent posts that some members do not read the guidelines.

Having no full time moderators means that multiple identical threads and other threads that breach the guidelines will occur and any management to correct, delete or move threads into the correct board(s) will not take place.

Unfortunately these are some of the shortcomings of the system that we work with. We have a choice to either (1) accept it, (2) try to get GR to change it, (3) or for some members to act as moderators without licence and change it from within. I would suggest, from recent events, that the latter is a non starter as some members will always see that it is not the responsibility of other members, unless sanctioned by GR, to moderate or police the forums.

AOGG
I wondered where the threads went.

As one who agreed with your message but opposed the way it was delivered, I saw nothing from the few that disagreed with you that would give any grief. I think those that opposed your threads remained objective in their replies.

However, there were some in support of your message that decided to shoot down in flames those against your message to the effect that one poster made clear they had no intentions of following the site owners wishes and would do as they please. I think it is this 'Do as I say and not as I do' attitude that annoys the less experienced that Janet refers to.