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Hi all,
Wondering if anyone could point me in the right direction please.
My great grandfather was Frederick Henry Gates born 1878 Shirley, Southampton. He married a Annie Lavinia Gearey in Southampton in 1900. They had 5 children together (Frederick, Rosina, Loorance, Reginald and Leslie). In the 1911 census they are living together in 119 Imperial Avenue, Shirley, Southampton.

We have today found out that he had a secret younger lady friend and they ran off together to America, leaving his wife and children. Not sure what year this was though.

Is there anyway I can look into this and where would I start?
Many thanks

He's not with the family in 1921:


Annie Lavinia
Gates
1872
Birthplace: Woolston, Hampshire, England
Southampton
Southampton
Hampshire

With Bessie Jane Gearey 1880, Reginald Raymond Gates 1907, Rosina Maude Gates 1902, Frederick Lionel Gates 1901, Lawrence Basil George Gates 1904, Leslie Victor Gates 1910, and Bessie Furnell 1886.

Thank you. May well of been around this time period then.

You could look at Outward Ship Passenger lists which are available on FindMyPast and Ancestry
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This website holds records for passenger arrivals at Ellis Island, New York the main port of entry on the East Coast.

https://heritage.statueofliberty.org/passenger-result

Gates, Frederick 1921 N/A Aquitania
Gates, Frederick 1922 N/A Empress of Scotland
Gates, Frederick 1925 Britain Andania

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The National Archives hold passenger lists between 1890 and 1960 within BT 26 - BT 27 and BT 32. To get these records for free you would need to register and sign in. Otherwise there is a charge

https://discovery.nationalarchives.gov.uk/details/r/C3070

That's great. Thank you.

Passenger lists, as mentioned, would be good as they may show who was accompanying.
Bear in mind that Frederick may have tried to conceal his identity somewhat eg. Only using Initials.

I will post what I find................

First name(s) Frederick
State New York
Last name Gates
Country United States
Sex Male
Destination place - country USA
Birth year 1875
Destination country United States
Age 50
Ship's name Andania
Age as transcribed 50
Ship's master's first name(s) A T
Marital status M
Ship's master's last name Brown
Occupation Retired
Shipping line Cunard
Departure day 2
Number of passengers 68
Departure month 11
Ship's departure port SOUTHAMPTON
Departure year 1925
Ship's destination port New York
Departure port Southampton
Ship's destination country USA
Departure country England
Record set Passenger Lists Leaving UK 1890-1960
Entry struck out N
Category Travel & migration
Destination port New York
Subcategory Passenger Lists
Destination New York
Collections from Great Britain, England, United States, Americas

First name(s) Frederick
Country United States
Last name Gates
Destination place - country USA
Sex Male
Destination country United States
Birth year 1879
Ship's name Oceanic
Age 25
Ship's registered tonnage 17273
Age as transcribed 25
Ship's square feet 15857
Marital status S
Ship's master's first name(s) J G
Occupation Laborer
Ship's master's last name Cameron
Departure day 27
Number of passengers 451
Departure month 1
Length of voyage in days 24
Departure year 1904
Ship's departure port LIVERPOOL
Departure port Liverpool
Ship's destination port New York
Departure country England
Ship's destination country USA
Entry struck out N
Record set Passenger Lists Leaving UK 1890-1960
Destination port New York
Category Travel & migration
Destination New York
Subcategory Passenger Lists
State New York
Collections from Great Britain, England, United States, Americas

Thank you both. I'll take a look into these. Think we can narrow it down to between 1911 and 1921 then, as he's no longer appearing with his family in 1921. Good idea about initial too, thank u!

1921 Census Of England & Wales
17, Suffolk Avenue, Southampton, Hampshire, England
Annie Lavinia Gates Head Female 1872 48 Woolston, Hampshire, England Upholstress Shepherd & Hedger House Furnisher
Frederick Lionel Gates Son Male 1901 20 Woolston, Hampshire, England General Clerk Junior The Cement Mlastking Cement Manufacturers Co Ltd
Rosina Maude Gates Daughter Female 1902 18 Southsea, Hampshire, England Seed Teching Laboratory Clerk Toogood & Sons Ltd Seed Merchchants
Lawrence Basil George Gates Son Male 1904 17 Southsea, Hampshire, England Boot & Shoe Salesman W J French & Son Boot Maker Out Of Work
Reginald Raymond Gates Son Male 1907 13 Andover, Hampshire, England - -
Leslie Victor Gates Son Male 1910 11 Southampton, Hampshire, England - -
Bessie Jane Gearey Sister Female 1880 41 Woolston, Hampshire, England Private Domestic -
Bessie Furnell Friend Female 1886 35 Meonstoke, Hampshire, England Private Domestic

Annie is 'married'.......no further comment on the record

I think you can rule out the 1904 sailing of a single man

1911 Census For England & Wales
119 Imperial Avenue Shirley Southampton, Shirley, Hampshire, England

Frederick Gates Head Married Male 33 1878 Upholsterer house Hampshire Southampton
Annie Gates Wife Married Female 38 1873 - Hampshire Woolston
Frederick Gates Son - Male 10 1901 School Hampshire Woolston
Rosina Gates Daughter - Female 8 1903 - Hampshire Portsmouth
Lawrence Gates Son - Male 7 1904 - Hampshire Portsmouth
Reginald Gates Son - Male 3 1908 - Hampshire Andover
Leslie Gates Son - Male 0 1911 - Hampshire Southampton
Ellen Pearce Visitor Married Female 47 1864 - Willshire Woodfalls
Charles Pearce Visitor Single Male 20 1891 Ships stokier Hampshire Bournemouth
Minnie Pearce Visitor Single Female 18 1893 Nurse domestic Hampshire Bournemouth
Leonard Pearce Visitor Single Male 15 1896 Shop assistant ironmongery Hampshire Bournemouth
Elsie Pearce Visitor - Female 13 1898 School Hampshire Southampton

UK and Ireland, Outward Passenger Lists, 1890-1960 for Frederick Gates
Southampton 1925 Oct. He was 50, she was 39.

Ticket number 3482

This chap travelled with wife Evelyn but listed his previous UK address in Lewes, Sussex

30th October 1925

Ship Andania

See Earlier post

We can exclude this Frederick I think.

Arrivals to the United States from foreign ports between approximately 1820 and December 1982. The records are arranged by port or airport of arrival.

https://www.archives.gov/research/immigration/passenger-arrival.html

Confirming that the 1925 sailing has no relevance

Gates
Evelyn Annie
1885
1984
England & Wales Deaths 1837-2007
Ringwood & Fordingbridge, Hampshire, England


1921 Census Of England & Wales
15, Akerman Road, Brixton, Lambeth, London & Surrey, England

Frederick Gates Head Male 1875 46 Lewes, Sussex, England Printer & Paper Merchant Traveller J B Blackmore & Coy Limited, Printer Paker Merchants, High Street, Merton Surrey
Evelyn Annie Gates Wife Female 1886 35 - Childrens Dress Maker -
Elizabeth Hitch Aunt Female 1848 72 Cirencester, Gloucestershire, England

Marriages Dec 1919 (>99%)
Gates Frederick Hitch Lambeth 1d 567
Hitch Evelyn A Gates Lambeth 1d 567

Thank you so much for all of your help. Much appreciated.

from the above 1911 census where Frederick is still living with his wife and children I'm wondering about the 18 year old visitor they had staying with them, Minnie Pearce 18. Maybe she was the young lady he sailed off to the US with?

No, not Minnie. She married and died in England.

In 1901 census, with her siblings and parents, she is Minnie R Pearce.

Birth:
PEARCE, MINNIE ROSE mmn WORT
GRO Reference: 1893 J Quarter in CHRISTCHURCH, HANTS Volume 02B Page 640


Minnie R Pearce
in the England & Wales, Civil Registration Marriage Index, 1837-1915
Name Minnie R Pearce
Spouse Surname Player
Registration Year 1914 [1914]
Registration Quarter Oct-Nov-Dec
Registration district Southampton
Inferred County Hampshire
Volume 2c
Page 118
Records on Page (Name)
Minnie R Pearce
Ernest A Player


Death:
PLAYER, MINNIE ROSA 27
GRO Reference: 1921 M Quarter in SOUTHAMPTON Volume 02C Page 52



Her sister Elsie also married (Matcham) and died in England, so not her either.

Do you know his exact DoB?

GATES, FREDERICK HENRY WHYMAN
GRO Reference: 1878 M Quarter in SOUTH STONEHAM Volume 02C Page 71

First name(s) Frederick Henry
Father's last name Gates
Last name Gates
Mother's first name(s) Sarah Ann
Sex Male
Mother's last name Gates
Baptism year 1878
Document type Bishop's Transcripts
Baptism date 26 May 1878
Record set Hampshire Baptisms
Place Freemantle

Anyone with a Full Ancestry Record could look at the following 1920 United States Federal Census. The result page is blurred to me but one of the results lists as

Orleans, Louisiana

Fred Gates 43
Henrietta Gates 24

Relationship isn't listed. Would Henrietta qualify as a "younger lady friend"?!

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Also

Fred Gates 44 New York, New York - no other occupants listed

Above posted by Jink20 -

Louisiana - Father and daughter both born Louisiana

and the New York one was born West indies.

There is another in New York (came up when checking the one posted by Jink20), but he was born New York 1875,. He is with Adeline age 28 wife and Lynn 37 brother.