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GranOfOzRubySlippers
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7 Jun 2010 12:56 |
Joan I agree and do not want to judge either, but must add find it difficult not to. I also hope this child finds a loving family, who will have waited a long time and will cherish it. My biggest problem is that our Carole is hurting, thus I hurt with her. Yes, being a mum would have to be the hardest job ever, you are their mum until the day you fall off your perch, no matter what. I also feel for this lady, such a difficult decision to make. However, she may change her mind, hard to say.
On a lighter note, I am FREEZING!!!! My fire went out and the wood is wet and I had trouble starting it again. Have been nearly sitting on top of the fire to warm up again. So off for a hot bath to thaw the rest of me out.
Yesterday, OH could not get some of my chickens in, I call this lot the Seven Dwarfs, so I said I will show you how. Smarty pants called them up and they followed all around, into the feed shed and then the rest of the pens then into their own pen. OH was not amused, and could not understand how I can do it. Well I was there when they hatched, I am their mum, so what does he expect. They even come up to the back door at times and I am sure if it was left open they would come inside and nest near the fire.
Love and hugs
Gail
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MrDaff
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7 Jun 2010 14:04 |
Well.... I am amazed.... Joan, I am so pleased you have asked people to be moderate in their condemnation of this poor woman.
How dare we condemn somone so vociferously when we do not know what is going on in her mind and her life... she may have mental health problems that no-one knows anything about, not even her nearest and dearest.
Almost everyone on this thread is here because they have had mental Health problems/depression etc, and yet still some of you cannot find compassion for this young woman . You do not know the facts, so how dare you stand as judge jury and executioner, those of you who have done so... and those who have stood in her defence, thank you for the voice of reason.
I came on here because I needed support from folk who would understand, so have been saddened and infuriated at some of the things I have read.
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maxiMary
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7 Jun 2010 14:31 |
It's not up to me to judge, my heart aches for the mother and child. I would imagine she is still in shock over the entire scenario. If she is sending photos, she is feeling something. When we are shocked we say and do things we would not normally consider. It's not anyone else's decision, when she is well again, she can make her decision rationally. In the meantime, Carole you are a gold star friend, support her as she struggles, let her make her own decision. And we will support you. Hugs MAry
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Deanna
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7 Jun 2010 18:47 |
You are quite right Daff. We all had 9 months to prepare for motherhood and with my second child, it still took me 3 days to accept her. AND, I am a very maternal woman. However... I am 70 now, but I still have enough of myself left ha ha ha ... to accept that to have a baby you did not expect must be a shock to say the least. No doubt she will do what she will do, and it will be the best for her and her family. Bless her.....there but for the grace of god ......
Gail... you are freezing?? Me too. Allan keeps telling me that it isn't cold.
Love to all, Deanna XXXXX
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Carole
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7 Jun 2010 22:34 |
I understand your upset Daff. When we hear a tiny baby is born we do tend to be a bit soppy about it(me included,) and to hear of a mother giving it away is hard to understand. But the mum has made up her mind, and will need her friends to help her and back her through this difficult time. I will be there for her even though I find it hard to understand how she can give the little girl away. But it's not my business for why, just to help her when she needs it. All of us who work with her will be there for her. For now she is entitled to a year's mat leave. Wonder how long she will take? No time will ever stop any doubts or guilt if she has any. (I don't mean that to sound cruel).
Joan you said you have the fire on, where are you?
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GranOfOzRubySlippers
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8 Jun 2010 08:08 |
Joan, all my chickens have names, we do not have ducks but the neighbour does, another has horses and cows, so have my own little zoo around me with all the wildlife that come into our place from time to time. So I suppose I am reliving my childhood with animals and pets everywhere.
OH moved all our wood out of a shed through the summer and did not put it back so wet timber. We were also wanting rain so will not complain too much. So far this year we have had more rain than the whole of 2009, so at least the trees and plants will not struggle in spring and summer this year. Tanks are also full of lovely water. Also have fire proofed out gutters as much as we could, hopefully no bushfires this summer.
I can now see out my kitchen window again as they are clean for a while, so binoculars are out on the sink so can do some bird and kangaroo watching across the river.
Daff sorry if we upset you in any way, please do not stay away. I think most of us had a knee jerk reaction, and really did not mean to judge. Unfortunately, we are all human and at times suffer from foot in mouth disease.
Off to cook some dinner.
Love and hugs
Gail
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Deanna
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8 Jun 2010 13:36 |
Hi all, Yet another dull rainy day here in England... everywhere in the UK it seems.
Joan, Allan does not wear jumpers.... he is naturally hot blooded and a jumper would kill him stone dead. Even in the winter he goes about the house with a vest on.... trousers obviously. We have just had our lunch, which in our hose is our main meal of the day. Allan is now fast asleep in his chair. He does that every day, a wee nap after his meal. But men do usually don't they? ;-0) AND, your youth seems to be like my husband's. Allan too had a life with ducks and chickens and a goat.... ground covered in veg for the house, nice life. Allan would love it now. He misses it a lot. I used to love my bare feet when I was younger, Allan was always telling me off for walking about barefooted. Now of course I can't NOT wear my slippers... how life changes us.
Well I am off now as I feel as if I am talking to myself. I will try and be back when you are all about and chatting. I think it is raining again... I can hear it but not see it from here.. frosted window glass in here.
Have a nice day wherever you are, whatever you are doing and I will see you all later. I'm off to watch DOCTORS.... ;-0)
Hugs to all, Deanna XXXX
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Treehunter
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8 Jun 2010 21:50 |
Hi Just popped on here from awhile,
My daugther Teri had a lumbar punchar(sorry if spelt it wrong)yeserday, but they couldnt get it right spot so tried 3 times, last one got it. So is in alot of pain today.
When she got in from hospital, an hour after i was up the hospital again, my grand daugther Caitlin fell and has broken her wrist.
What dont help i am in alot of pain myself my back and hips are killing me. Dont help by haveing to use stairs here when they both in bed.
Got a few more weeks of being here yet.
((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))to anyone who needs them
Hazelx
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Deanna
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9 Jun 2010 10:31 |
Hi Hazel, it seems ages since you were here, or is it my feeble mind forgetting things? A lumbar puncture is 'no fun' at anytime, but to have to try so many times... bless her. My husband has had to endure doctors trying to take arterial blood from him... in fact the doctors themselves said... 2he's had enough, We'll try again later. I have watched the doctors trying to take blood from my son and could not get the needle in!!! Oh that was awful to watch, but must have been worse of course to FEEL it. However, how is Teri now, and did they find whatever it was the suspected? And Caitlin, poor soul, is she still in pain? You of course don't count.... mummies are supposed to carry on regardless. ha ha ha
Joan that sounds like a nice day you had. I so wish I was able to get to an archive. I would need my son to take me and then he would have to stick around because of my wheelchair! He wouldn't mind I'm sure, he would read his book, but I feel it is such an imposition.... even if there was one near us. ;-0)
Gail if you are that eager for work to do.... my inside windows could do with a clean too. Hows about it then?
We had the heating on this morning..... can you believe that? Allan put it on which is an even bigger shock as he is NEVER cold! It is JUNE f.g.s....
My two men have gone to the shops for a few bits and bobs. I was going to sit quietly and read my book. BUT... You know what it is like. I went for a wsh, decided then to wash the pedestal set and put a clean one down. Then sorted out the rubbish mail and shredded what we did not need... put the bits in the bedroom ........ get the picture? How many of you have done the same today? Everyone? I thought so.
Now I may as well have a look at my e-mails then finish tidying the kitchen and make the bed!! There are so many jobs which really need doing, but I am no longer able. and it does get to me sometimes.
Well I'm off as I have started to ramble.... ha ha ha.
See you all later, have a good day. Raining here again .
Love to all and as Hazel says.... a hug to all who need one. Deanna XXX
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Sydneybloke
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9 Jun 2010 12:58 |
Deanna, it seems to me quite a while since Hazel was on here so it's probably not you... I am also freezing and it's June here, too. Of course freezing is relative. Don't know the temperature at the mo but it was 9 C 48 F this morning and with absolutely no heating the apartment gets chilly. I am not really too mean to turn on a radiator but prefer to rug up at bit. Spoke to someone today, his mother went to China a while ago. He got a phone call from her. She was in Tian An Men Square, and it was 50 below !!!!! I cannot even conceive that. Anything below about -10 is beyond my comprehension. Joan might like it up to 45 C (113 F) is she kidding us? Adelaide's heat may be dry but in Sydney's humditity I begin to wilt at about 30, 35 is about my maximum unless I can find somewhere to chill out. As it is past my bedtime I shall merely wave to Hazel, Carole, Carole, Mary, Gail, Joan, Daff and anyone I have forgotten. xx and hugs, Colin
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maxiMary
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9 Jun 2010 14:50 |
I don't think I've filled you in on our Open House. It rained all morning, but we fired up the BBQ (thanks to my dear son Dave), and all of a sudden the sun came out and we had a lovely afternoon.Had about 50 people turn up. Unfortunately, just as the first few people arrived, Sarah distinguished herself by having a seizure, Gareth's dog Dudley kept trying to get to her, so we switched dogs, and Dudley lay his front legs on Sarah as she completed the seizure, then lay beside her for her 3-hour sleep. Dudley is much more sensitive to seizures than Sandy, who is much more puppy-like in his personality. Dudley is the serious one!!!! Gareth is adapting well to Dudley, and (fingers crossed) has had a much calmer week. Two weeks left to the school year, then the fun begins. We have C's grad on Friday from the Behavioural Science Technology diploma course, which involves going out of town for a couple of days, as it's a 4-hour drive. I am still trying to visualise 7 people and 2 big dogs in my van. A friend will stay at my house with the other dogs. and the cat. It's a rainy day and very chilly for June, it's been lovely recently, we are all well-tanned, the tomato plants are growing nicely. Have spots of colour all over the garden. We borrowed a 'shelter' on the w/e to use for shade, had an unexpected windstorm with lots of rain on Sat night and down came the shelter in extra pieces, now I have to replace the shelter. It never ends. I'm having a 'me' day as the rain has played havoc with my joints!! Time for tea and a good book and legs up. TTFN, have a good day all, and hugs all round. Mary
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Carole
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10 Jun 2010 09:34 |
Haxel sorry to hear your daughter had to have a lumber puncture, I understand they are very painfull. Then your granddaughter breaking her wrist, how long will that take to heal?
Mary pleased the weather changed for the better Saturday for you. What a lot of people you had to entertain! When the dog lies at the side of G or S after a seizure does it help them relax or something?
Deanna my husband is like yours he is always hot. Winter it's nice to warm me up when I get into a cold bed but it soon becomes too hot for me! Summer I can't bare to be near him the heat off him is so hot.
Eileen are you ok?
Liz thinking of you Did you see Dutch's grandson got bit by a dog?
Gail you are right we did have a knee jerk reaction! Going to see her today, I couldn't have last week I just wouldn't have handled it very well. Poor woman had an echo cardio scan (or something like that) the Dr said she has had a heart attack at sometime.
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GranOfOzRubySlippers
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10 Jun 2010 10:57 |
Carole, glad you are going for a visit, at least now the shock has worn off. I already know you are a good friend to this lady and will continue to be so. Be strong for yourself first though, and as you are already so helpful to so many do not stretch yourself too far.
Joan, we got your temps this year. We only got air con about 4 years ago, still do not have it on much usually of a night to cool down enough for sleep. We did have in on a lot when grandson was her for a few weeks, mainly when he went for his nap. Where I live we tend to get extremes of heat and cold. First car we had with air con was in 2000, do not know how we managed without it now. We also have an outside area that is covered in wisteria and spend a lot of time there throughout the year, except when very cold. Even in the hottest weather we get a breeze through that part of the yard, so quite lovely.
Mary, how lovely Dudley and Sandy sound, Dudley must be also more mature. Some dogs never grow out of their puppishness, but I would say Sandy will come into his own when he is more adjusted as well. What a blessing they both are. Pleased your open house went well, Have a great time at C's graduation on the weekend.
Hope Hazel's daughter is improving and things get back to normal soon.
Hi to Sharron, Liz, Caz, Colin, Deanna and anyone else I have missed. Thinking of everyone.
Love and major hugs
Gail
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Deanna
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10 Jun 2010 17:02 |
Hi everyone.... cold again today. Mary that is nothing short of Miraculous the way Dudley looked after Sarah during, and indeed after her seizure.I am so impressed Mary. What a wonderful help they are going to be to you, Colleen and the children. Did you keep Allan and me a 'doggie bag' from your BBQ? I didn't think so..... ;-0(
Joan and Gail, We have no Air conditioning, but we have fans in every room... well it is a tiny bungalow, but we are well furnished with cool air when we need it.
Carole, I know what you mean. Allan is also like a hot water bottle, which is lovely in the winter, but he then gets so hot himself that he strips himself and me!! I have to pull the quilt back over myself. Why is it that we end up with men/women completely different to ourselves? Aren't we supposed to be *compatible*? Actually, we are, it shows in the form of our priorities.
Feel better after your wee rest Mary? You do need it, you are good girl. Love to all, May be back later. Deanna XXXX
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Carole
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10 Jun 2010 18:06 |
Been to see mother and baby. Took presents for both, from us all at work, and guess what! She has decided to KEEP HER! I'm so pleased for them all. The baby is so tiny her head the size of a tennis ball. Her tiny hands just hold onto the end section of an adult finger. She has tiny little fingers long but so thin. She is in an incubator to keep her warm but no other support (a feeding tube up her nose). Big sister (17yrs) was there feeling pleased to have a sister at last. Oh joy :0)) Have photos to put on face book if you want to see her
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*** Mummo ***
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10 Jun 2010 18:39 |
Carole she is such a sweetie, bless her. So glad that the mum has changed her mind, but l sure she knows she has a lot of support from her friends. May they have a very happy and healthy future together, x
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Treehunter
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10 Jun 2010 22:17 |
Hi all, got 5mins to myself so popped on here to see how everyone is.
Thanks to you all for your kind notes.
Had to take daugther to hospital again this morning couldnt see out of her right eye and the bottom eye lid had droped down. But all ok now and she was sent home again, but if anything happens got to get her back again. She has to go to see about results on the 1st July. So now a waiting game.
Grand daugther has to go back to hospital on the 23rd,but thing is that we have the x ray here and the doctor hasnt even seen it yet, It was only a nurse that looked at them and put the plaster on.
She is getting fed up with it on now.But she is doing well dressing her self eating and that. But thats kids for you isnt it?
Well dont know when be here next.
((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))for you all
Take care
Hazelx
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GranOfOzRubySlippers
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11 Jun 2010 03:28 |
Oh Carole, the baby is just so beautiful. Reminds me so much of my youngest such tiny and fragile little things. To think I had one so small over 30 years ago is amazing. When I brought my poor wee one home, she had to be nursed laying on a pillow so she would not loose too much weight from handling. So many memories came flooding back with the photos. She also had a head the size of a tennis ball, I knitted dolls clothes to bring her home, she still cannot comprehend that the little bonnet I knitted does fit a tennis ball.
Would say the mum also had a knee jerk reaction when bub was born. She would have been so shocked. Pleased she has changed her mind, such a little blessing.
Deanna, we also have fans in 4 rooms, probably why we do not use the air con as much. I would much rather a fan as nose does not get stuffed up, and no sinus pain. My OH is a bit of a frog and feels the cold, sometimes he has the fire so high when he is home I cannot stand it, then he complains it is too hot to sleep. So now I close the bedroom door to keep the heat out, when he is home.
Sharron is not well and has a tooth problem. She is not looking for sympathy, thats our Sharron, but I will give it to her regardless. Look after yourself and get some anti biotics quickly, and pain killers are a must.
Gail
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Sydneybloke
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12 Jun 2010 09:59 |
Just a quick drop by to say hello Carole. I knew someone, much younger than your friend, who decided to adopt out. After the birth she and the father decided to keep the baby. She was only 17, and died when the baby was still small. Your friend I think is going to need a hand now and then, especially if she is single. And of course there is always the chance that the baby will be not quite OK after such a premature birth. Also Mary, congratulations on the dogs. Hope it will make a huge difference to your life as well as S and G. Warm hellos to Sharron, Hazel, Joan and Gail. Also Joyce (both), Eileen and YCaz if you look in. Colin
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dutch
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12 Jun 2010 10:14 |
Hello All,will keep this short as not very well but needed someone to talk to ,have just got another 4 speeding tickets from that son of mine ,i just cant keep on going like this my heath is not good now ,had MRI scan and they found something on my spine ,Caz thinks it could be another one of my discs just got to wait till monday to see docter,dont sleep because of the pain and now this worry over what my sons done again,sorry to rattle on take care all Dutchx
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