General Chat

Sometimes I think threads get missed for no apparent reason. I have to say that if I put a thread on gen I usually get replies whereas I may get one or two if I put it on Chat. Whereas others who post regularly on chat can guarantee to get a good response. I do try to respond to threads as I know how annoying it can be to not have replies but truly didn't see yours. I am interested as a contact of mine is trying to establish his connection to our family via DNA

Hi Gail, Sharron, Carole and Barbra.
I changed my name temporarily (my real name is uncommon) but a certain genealogical web site won't let me change it back. Perhaps someone has pinched it? Or am I being paranoid again?

Anyhow, I haven't seen David on the boards for a few days. I hope he is OK. I would love to retire but can't bring myself to do it. I can manage four years until I qualify for an age pension, but really don't fancy having to go and grovel before the junior clerks at Centrelink. I have bad experiences of them, when I was unemployed in 2000 and 2007.

I agree about volunteering being a good thing to do in retirement, or even before. I haven't done anything for a while, partly because I am so tired out with work and the travelling. My OH retired a couple of years ago. Took her a while to find something she felt comfortable with and wanted to commit to. More recently, she has been unwell as some of you know and has dropped out of the volunteer circuit until early next year.

Gail, I did see your DNA post and apart from knowing what the Y chromosome and mitochondrial DNA lines mean for genealogical research it was a bit incomprehensible to me. Besides, I was reading it at lunch time at work and didn't really have anything to contribute.
[Belated] Congratulations on your results. Does it mean that you have Druze ancestry, or are they just one group with your haplotype? (the word is vaguely ticking my brain, probably from Biology lectures 45 years ago.

I have also seriously considered dropping out. As little of my ancestry is English it has mainly been a place to create a tree, but I now use Ancestry. The main activity I have on it now is chat, but have been burned in the last few days by some very nasty people. Now, I am not sure whether the threads are worthwhile.

There are some vicious cyber-bullies out there, Not that I have been a particular target, but I know some people who have been.

i have not quite figured all the DNA stuff out yet, I think the Druze have the same genome type. My mothers lot appear to be from come from Ethiopia and the Sudan, going back about 50, 000, years, and the Ice Immigrants. My dad's going back about 40, 000 years, and the The Artisans, probably the first cave painters.

I have what is called a genetic marker in my mouth, basically the inside of my mouth is covered in a type of mole, which shows up with people who are descendant from around the Mediterranean Sea, dentist love taking photos of these strange markings. I have been able to trace some ancestry back to Turkey, Egypt, Lebanon and Israel, coastlines, so it does tie in.

Gail

It sounds fascinating Gail, if a little complicated for my simple brain. But do put your thread up again, maybe people found it hard to understand if it was over technical.

Colin, I would not let the few cyber bullies on here destroy the pleasure in chatting to cyber friends. they should be ignored.

Now don't delete it gail, I want to know if somebody can elucidate, fascinating.

I had been working night shifts in the weeks before my Mother died.
Due to one thing and another I was getting very little sleep and was exteemly tired.

On the morning my Mother died I'd worked a 13 hour shift. I'd not long got home and into bed when I awoken by people hammering on my front door. I was angry to put it very midly when I answered the door.
It was my cousin who was my mother's close neighbour. Someone had boken into my Mothers house because they had not seen her up early walking her dog, also she didn't answer the door.
She was found at the foot of the staire where my Father had died 2 years earlier.

I got to the local hospital ICU with my wife and brother. About 15 minutes later my Mother was pronounced dead by the ward sister. Her death was completely unexpected.

On the day of her cremation I was chief mourner.The cremation before hers was running behind schedule making Mothers 20 minutes late. During this time I in the lead car with my wife my aunt and my brother were just 2 metres from the hearse containing my Mother. The grief was unbearable and the rain incessant.

Ive never quite forgiven my inapproprite anger born of shock and disbelief and other emotions.
That was 15 years ago

David, you need to forgive yourself. Anger is one of the first reactions to death. You were probably angry that your Mum had left you. Your Mum would certainly have forgiven you that, anger born of love. I too remember the unreality of being in the lead car behind the hearse carrying my Mother's coffin, so much so that when my Dad died we agreed to meet the coffin hearse at the crematorium driving there in our own cars.

David what a sad story. But I think under those curcumstances I and a lot of other people would have been angry to woken unexpectedly.
When my mil died the families anger was put on her Dr. She had cancer and we all thought she had been treated and was going to be ok.

Gail I also didn't see your DNA thead is it still on here? I would be interested. Mick in the bush also had his DNA test results on here some time ago. Very interesting.

Sharron again you made me smile! x

Been into town to put some money in the bank this morning.

Makes a change from taking it out Carole!!!

Hazel, I know EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL.
My son is also depressed and seems to be getting lower and lower.
I do not know how to help him , as everything we say and do...... IS WRONG!!
He has had such a hard time , physically and it has affected him greatly, bless him.
He is a good, kind man, and so strong a character, we are sometimes stunned that he could ever be depressed.

He is such a good son, and a good friend, and yet he has had such a bad bad time...
I wish I could do SOMETHING to make his life easier.
Ah well, such is life I suppose.
"TIME AND THE HOUR WILL PASS THROUGH THE ROUGHEST DAY"......
but could it rush a little for my poor son.... please??

Hazel, I know EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL.
My son is also depressed and seems to be getting lower and lower.
I do not know how to help him , as everything we say and do...... IS WRONG!!
He has had such a hard time , physically and it has affected him greatly, bless him.
He is a good, kind man, and so strong a character, we are sometimes stunned that he could ever be depressed.

He is such a good son, and a good friend, and yet he has had such a bad bad time...
I wish I could do SOMETHING to make his life easier.
Ah well, such is life I suppose.
"TIME AND THE HOUR WILL PASS THROUGH THE ROUGHEST DAY"......
but could it rush a little for my poor son.... please??

Kitchen doing .... okay!
Allan and I..... out of our tiny minds!!
The cupboards will be put in tomorrow, and then the floors, then the painting, then the bathroom.... then we MAY have our home back!
Sleeping with the contents of our bathroom, and larder.... living with the living room full of our kitchen.... is not conducive to relaxation!!
Deanna and Allan, survivors! XXXX

PS.... did I say that I phoned you Liz?

How is Caz... ?

love Deanna XXX

You will get there Deanna, not long now.

Hi

I have put some American BMD requests on a lookups thread. I wait with breath that is bated.

Ben

Before she was pronounced dead by the ward sister I was standing at the end of her bed willing her to hang on. My hand was gripping her left ankle, can't explain why.

A fews years ago, relatively recent, I woke up after a troubled nights sleep. On my left ankle was a bruise as though a hand had gripped me, you could see the finger marks.

It is a physical impossibility that I put this mark on myself. How did it get there ? I don't know.

Hello David, I have no explation for the bruise because I do not believe in ghosts etc.
I got a book about 10 yrs ago called "When Anger Hurts". It deals with continuing anger rather than what you experienced, but I was an angry person and I can still flare up inappropriately.
Anger is usually a presenting symptom of a different emotion. This hidden emotion is often fear. In your case I suspect the shock of your Mum's sudden death and the nasty fears and imaginations of what happened to her may have been behind your anger, but I am not a psychologist. Your mind was trying to make sense of what happened. There are stages of grief as you probably know as well as I do. Denial, anger and all the rest.
Finding your Mum like that raised so many questions. I think you had possibly dealt with them, but your brother's illness has brought the fears back to the surface.
Dreams are not rational. I often dream of my mother at various events, even though she died before the events. Such as Dad's funeral. He outlived her.
My offer to talk to you via PM is still there, and there are some things I could talk to you about. There is an 11 hour time difference though, it is almost 7 am and I am about to go to work. Sometimes if I am not busy I access my email account from the office. Colin.

David I was dreaming one night that I was digging my nails into my husband in temper. I woke the next morning with marks in my stomache with blood coming through! I had been doing it to myself. Very strange it felt. I think it's posible you did it to yourself too.

Carole, that must have been strange.

I think David would have realised he was hunched up to reach his ankle tho?

Deanna, have pmd you, sorry I missed the call love.
Hope your lad feels brighter soon, it's such a worry to see our offspring fed up and low, and so hard to help them out of it.

Lizxx

I would have thought the pain from digging my nails into myself would have woken me, but it didn't. it was when I was showering I saw the blood. Wondered where on earth the marks come from, then slowly a recolection of the nights dream came to me.
I know it sounds strange but I really think David could have done it. By the time he woke up he would have been straightened up

One of my children was a sleep walker, after seeing that, I believe you could do anything in your sleep and not know. It is very scary to watch, knowing someone is asleep and being able to function as a waking state.

I wake myself up snoring at times and wonder where the hell the noise is coming from. :))

Gail