General Chat

I rang my mum the other day, and she was able to give me a great aunts maiden name, all the childrens names, including 2 rough birth dates. Also great aunts mothers maiden name. From that, I have found great aunt and uncles marriage, great aunts birth and death and 2 of the childrens births. Mum was 80 this year, and these things tend to come to her when least expected.

Carol, That is brilliant - wish my Mum-in-law was that good. She can't even remember anything about her grandparents - doesn't think she ever had any!!!! Don't like to disagree with her!! Elisabeth

I think my now 89 year old mum has a selective memory to suit herself. LOL I asked her one day a couple of years ago if she'd had an uncle named William. No said she. A few weeks later she starts to tell me all about her uncle "Bill" who'd had a son that was disabled!!!!!!

I asked my mum about her aunts and uncles - ie asked for their names and who they married and she said she couldn't remember (she was 72 at this time and in excellent mental health). The following weekend I said "tell me about Uncle Percy" and so on through all the names I had in the tree and she went down 4 generations and named all children and their children and spouses. I think the secret is to ask direct questions (if you know names etc) rather than be vague.

My mum is happy to help in my quest. The problem is when I ask a direct question, she can`t think of the answer. We were talking about something entirely different, when she suddenly remembered that great aunts mothers brother married aunt Liz, who I already had as great uncles aunt. From that, a lot of names came to her. Now, mum keeps a pad handy, so if she remembers something, she jots it down.

Carol, I asked my widowed Mother in law about her family and she could only give me her paternal Grandparents' names and the surnames of her maternal Grandparents - every time I find something out....months of searching, sending off for certs. contacting people via the net, hunting through libraries, trips to records offices and gleefully pass the info I've discovered on, she says "Oh yes...I remember now.. so and so married so and so..and proceeds to reel off all the info I've spent months and months discovering!! Emma.

Emma am so glad its not jusst me that happens to. My Nan is the same, I asked questions directly and non directly seaching for the tiniest of a clue. Then I have a hunt and send off for the cert using cash I don't really have. I then proudly say look what i found out and she says.................. I could've told you that!!!!! Shelli

If I had known say 40yrs ago that I would now be doing a family tree I would have written all the info down as and when I received it.My parents are now both dead but I have been lucky in finding relations I haven't seen for 34 years and they are filling in the gaps...maybe if we all had hindsight things would have been easier...................

when terry started doing his tree we found out his gt.gt.g/father was called moses.we told his dad whose reply was "oh yea,i remember him" we just looked at each other.moses died in the 1800's!!! rest in peace dad. susie

I asked my mother some questions about ancestors. She said she didn't know what I was bothering for as they were all dead!. A couple of weeks later I told mother how helpful my mother - in law was and then there was a big change in approach !! Keith

Shelli, It's not only the elderly who remember things when certs have been bought, I have to admit that it has happened to me twice in recent weeks. I have sent for certs and the information on the certs has triggered my own memory and I've said to myself "I knew that" Cathy :)

I've also found that the more I tell my dad about his family, the more that he "remembers". Maggy

My mother b 1905 d 1968 and although she used to talk about her childhood she never mentioned her Grandmother But when I checked the 1901 census she was living with the family and did so until her death in 1915 when my mum would have been ten Also when tracing my husbands family I sent for his Grans birth certificate and found out that her mothers maiden name was Leake on telling my husband this he replied yes thats right when I was an apprentice plumber to my uncle we used to laugh about it Bren

I'm glad everyone elses Grans and Mums are like my Nan. She couldn't remember any of the names of her Dad's brothers and sisters but when I tracked them down on the Census and said 'can you remember Uncle so and so', of course she did! Even tried to trick Nan by asking if she remembered a (non existant) Auntie Emma but she didn't fall for it.