General Chat

Hi Joanne, I appreciate what you're saying and you are right, you certainly know who your true friends really are, for a long while I thought I had the plague, anyway the person I'm best friends with is myself ... thank goodness, thanks for your comment Joanne. Audrey.

Yes it's very common. You lose a lot of friends, but the one's who stand by you are the real friends. I think a lot of wives get it into their head that because you are 'manless' you become a threat to their marriages. Stupid I know. Don't worry you will make other friends in your new life. Jo.

Hi Marion, what an inspiration you are, good for you, but it is the change in attitude of friends that has amazed me, it is as you so rightly say 'we could be a possible threat', how very sad is that, I don't know whether to feel sorry for them or laugh, anyway, like you say, at the end of the day 'tis their loss. Thanks for your views Marion. Audrey.

Hi Ernest, I would be a bit more pushy if I knew in advance there was going to be a 'do' it's the fact that I get informed of these functions after the event, when you get and I quote for example 'lovely birthday do so and so had last saturday, we had a wail of a time' and these are the people you've known for years, however, it would be nice to be asked sometimes but thanks for your thoughts Ernest. Audrey.

Hi Bryan, you talking of dating agencies (and by the way it's not for me either I'm just not interested,) I was invited out for a meal once by a couple I'd known for years, I was rather excited and aprehensive the latter me thinking I'll be the odd one out, we got to this restaurant/pub and sat down with our drinks to decide what we were going to eat before ordering, when we were joined by a chap who just 'happened' to know my two friends, whereupon and without any hesitation he was invited to have a meal with us, it was a set up it was so obvious, I felt a right lemon and very uncomfortable, so like yourself I do believe in fate ... what will be will be. Audrey.

AUDREY( in capitals) Come on Lass you have tyo overcome any reticence and hold your corner. Even to the point of being a pain, push yourself forward and dont be put to one side. If there is an event or function going on and you really would like to attend. Then let it be known that you want to go. Say something like. Oh that sounds nice Is there any room for a single girl. You will find that people will start to take your prescence a little more seriously. and the invites will come more readily. If you are recently widowed or divorced. People may think that they are walking on eggshells when they are near to you. You have to make it clear that you are there and you have no intention of dropping off into oblivion. In other words be a little pushy. BUT dont overdo it. Good luck Ernestxx

Hi David, I guess this situation must happen with the fellas too, but no disrespects I thought it might have been a tad easier for the single male to be able to socialize, I suppose I'm a bit old fashioned whereby it's ok for a man say to walk into a pub on his own no one would think that odd, but for a woman to walk into a pub on her own, it would look odd, anyway, you are right David, true friends stick around. Audrey

hi audrey, first of all,this happens to most couples,when for one reason,or another they are parted,its human nature,and i cant see it changing. my youngest daughter made me look at a dating website,its called..datingdirect..and has a very good reputation,but it wasent for me,and so did nothing about it! ime a great believer in fate,and..what will be,will be..i cant say ime happy being single,i miss the hugs and cuddles,and that feeling of having someone next to me in bed. ime strange,that i like to be with someone at breakfast,when their hair is all a mess,and not much makeup. i fell in love with nel mcandrew,on..ime a celebrity..she had no makeup,just natural,and her great personality came out,but a few weeks later,she was in the studio,all done up,and not my cup of tea...sorry nel...your loss lol bryan.

Hi judith, you definitely got that in one, how very sad that your so called 'friends' can suddenly change, I haven't changed as a person, only my circumstances and situation have, and as for the 'fair game' bit! do these fellas think we are 'desperate' I think not! well I can honestly say, I'm definetly not lonely, fortunately I happen to like my own company, I have plenty to occupy me and the only downside to living on my own is the lack of a social life it would be nice to go out for the odd drink or perhaps the odd meal say and you cant very well do that on your own ... I mean you'd look a bit of a wally sat at a table having a conversation with a sauce bottle ... what would you say! the mind boggles.

Audrey i found for the first few months i was asked along but after a few times i started to feel out of place, the odd one out so to speak, then yes the invites and phone calls dried up, apart from the people who i found were my true friends the rest just melted away. Iam now making new friends not least here on this site Regards David

I'm wondering how many women have found their social life had abruptly come to an end after becoming widowed or divorced, have you noticed that invites to social gatherings almost always are for 'couples', I've realised this since I've been on my own, still got my friends (all have partners though!) but when it comes to invites to the once usual social gatherings I seem to be 'forgotten' I feel a bit like the xmas toy when it says 'batteries not included' Has anyone else experienced the same.