General Chat

There has just been an article on the lunchtime news about the late author Iris Murdoch. Scientists are analysing her last novel and pinpointing the fact that her vocubulary was becoming poorer. Alzheimers sufferers forget words and feel a great frustration at this - they supplement the forgotten words with another - and their conversation can appear to still be flowing. Someone I know used to insert the word UNIT for things they had forgotten - like ' did you see that UNIT on the bus' or I was reading the daily UNIT' Its a coping mechanism Alzheimers is one of the cruellest illnesses - it robs you of the person twice - first it steals them as a person , then their body eventually is stolen too. They still sometimes have little flashes of their former spirit, so I beg of you - if you have someone with this illness - try and cherish these moments - its what can keep you going when they look at you with that blank stare - and they dont know who you are.

Yes, She I saw the news item. This is a trait we noticed with my Dad last year.........but when you are with people eveery day, we don't always notive these things enough for bells to start ringing. I think they will make some startling discoveries by analising her writing. Hazel

My nan suffered from quite bad alzheimers for the last few years. I'm comforted by the fact that in her last few hours when I sat with her that she seemed to have total clarity of everything around her. She did that thing with words - sort of. She could never get names right so would literally run through a list of names in the family hoping she'd eventually get the right one.

she well said hun. as a carer i visit quite a few alzheimers sufferers daily. the only way they recognise me is by my uniform. they often get aggressive due to frustration. i have been bitten,punched,bit and had my hair pulled. it is all part of my job.a few minutes later they are as sweet as pie. it is a sad,cruel illness and i often end up in tears because i feel so helpless. they tend to go through stages.first is the forgetfulness,then the memory loss and eventually they are like babies. they are incontinent and have to be fed as they cannot feed themselves. susie

Zoe, I think thats a gift of most elderly people to be honest, my Dads been doing that for years ! Paul

Hazel - that is so true - we dont expect our parent to deteriorate in any way - we are too close to it, but then the thought there is something wrong creeps in and you feel such guilt when your fears are confirmed. Zoe - yes! I felt it was one final gift when the last few hours were lucid and the person knew who I was. Susie - thank god for people like you who feel the compassion for the sufferers and give them the dignity they deserve She xx

Paul thinking about it my other nan does it too. me and my cousin Jo are the spit of each other (especially our bottom sizes) with only her 8 years youth making the difference. Nan can rarely figure out which one of us to call Zo and which Jo if we're both there Zoe

Thank you Shelia for putting this here about Iris Murdoch, this certainly hits home for so many of us, my darling mother who is 92 is one of many suffering from this,and it is so hard for all of us as the family see a different person before us. She has the occasional blip of remembering,and for a split second your heart lurches and thinks shes come back,but then suddenly the change is there. My little granddaughter who is ten,knows that if her greatgrandmother asks a question a thousand times,she will answer her a thousand times. Somedays not knowing who I am.is so heartbreaking,and I am trying to enjoy the spirit of Christmas,knowing it could be the last one I have to spend with my darling mum. Thank you for putting this on here. Susie, Thank you to,for your caring and wonderful work,you deserve a mention to. thank you so much. trish xxxxxx

Rox - that is one of the cruellest things isnt it - when they have a lucid moment - they KNOW what is wrong with them and it so distresses them. Trish - I know sweetheart. And well done your little grand daughter - you must be very proud of her - Cherish the time your mother remembers - that little shining moment of their spirit is magical. For those of you who do have family with this illness I support you - it can be so frustrating when you visit them and they dont know who you are . The last visit I had with my mother before her last illness she didnt know me and I broke my heart on the flight home. When we had to go to the hospital in her last few day s I sat with her - and she knew me - called me her baby then said - you've grown -my mum was still in there somewhere. As Zoe said - in the last short while they regain their clarity of mind and it is an honour to be there with them. Its like a final special gift