General Chat

Rules for Women 1. It is only common courtesy that you should leave the seat on the toilet UP when you are done. 2. If you are cooking a special dinner for a man, be sure to include something from each of the four major male food groups: Meat, Fried, Beer, and Red. 3. Don't make him hold your purse in the Shop 4. Despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary in many of the fine bars and clubs throughout the country, not all men are cretins deserving your contempt. 5. Shopping is not fascinating. 6. When he asks for a threesome with you and your best friend, he is only joking. 7. Unless the answer is yes. 8. In which case, can he videotape it? 10. The man is ALWAYS in charge of poking the campfire with a stick and/or tending the Barbeque 11. Trying to provoke a large, dangerous-looking felon from across the room is not funny. 12. Money does not equate love. Not even in Newcastle 13. Any attempt by a man to prepare food, no matter how feeble (i.e., Microwaving a burrito, fixing Spaghetti, etc.) should be met with roughly the same degree of praise a parent might shower upon their infant when it walks for the first time. 14. Those male models with perfect bodies are all gay. Accept it. 15. He heard you the first time. 16. You know, YOU can ask HIM out too... Let's spread the rejection around a little. 17. If you truly want honesty, don't ask questions you don't really want the answer to. 18. Of COURSE he wants another beer. 19. The guy doesn't ALWAYS have to sleep on the wet spot. 20. Dogs good. Cats bad. 21. Any sort of injury involving the testicles is not funny. 22. If he has to sit through "Legends of the Fall", you have to sit through "Showgirls". 23. "Fine." is not an acceptable way to end an argument. 24. Do not question a man's innate navigational abilities by suggesting he stop for directions. 25. He was not looking at that other girl. 26. Well, okay... maybe a little. 27. Okay, so what! He was looking at her. Big deal. Like you never looked at another guy... 29. He is the funniest, strongest, best-looking, most successful man you have ever met. 30. And all your friends think so too. Especially the cute ones. 31. Your (select appropriate item:) butt/boobs/hair/makeup/legs look fine. As a matter of fact, it/they look damn good. Stop asking. 36. Dirty laundry comes in several categories: Looks fine/smells fine, Looks fine/smells bad, Looks dirty/smells fine. Unless you intend to wash it, do not try to disrupt piles organized in this manner. 37. Yes, Sharon Stone/Pamela Anderson/Cindy Crawford are prettier than you. Just like Brad Pitt/Antonio Banderas/Keanu Reeves are better looking than him. But since neither one of you is going to be dating any of these people, love the one you're with. 38. Of course size matters, and boy does he have the grandaddy of them all. 39. His (fill in appropriate selections:) bald spot/beer gut/impossibly thick glasses/impotency/scabby rash is cute. 40. Don't hog the covers. 41. Watching football is a major turn-on for you. But please wait until the halftime Ads. to act upon that... 42. He does not just want to be friends. 43. A successful date always starts with the woman uttering the sentence: “why don't we just skip the expensive dinner and stay here having freaky circus sex all night?" These comments are not necessarily my own, but some that were collected from various male counterparts!

NO i'm not looking for a scrap ... just some barbed comments will do..:)

Wow.. I cant add anymore to what you have posted Peter. Except i think your very brave.LOL And i hope you dont die a lonley man. Tony Oz.who is PSML

Well i hope not to die lonely but, my wife will have the final say on THAT ......................ooooooeeeeerrrr

That last comment was good peter LOL

yer but, no but ...yer but, no but..............it were only a joke!

Peter. If i could just add one more ( hope you don't mind.) Ladies,please do not flick through the channels on T.V with the remote, if a girl is on an ad, clad in just a bikinni, as this can damage a mans eyesight. Tony Oz. Thank you.

Tony LOL Same if its a hunk and your rushing to the next channel with the remote in your hand hey fair is fair LOL Pat x

Also, saying to the canine friend "get him" -'rover'... 'rex.'. or.... 'spot' is not funny when holding a pint of boddingtons

Exactly... Peter. Also ladies, please read the small print at the bottom of the thread......These comments are not necessarily my own, but some that were collected from various male counterparts! Thanks. Tony.Oz

Missing you all. Love Tony.lol

:-)

Hi, You lost me on number 2. Cooking......................? Not a concept I'm familiar with. Gwynne

Dont understand Number 19,,

Thanks for the good humoured replies... as the content was light hearted!!........look out for the next thread .........the'Snow Shoveler'... Regards to all Peter.

more more more