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A post on my FB

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 9 Aug 2021 11:53

For those who enjoy grammar...
• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.

SuffolkVera

SuffolkVera Report 9 Aug 2021 13:11

Love it :-D :-D :-D

Kentishmaid

Kentishmaid Report 9 Aug 2021 13:21

Brilliant :-)

LaGooner

LaGooner Report 9 Aug 2021 13:31

:-D :-D :-D :-D

ZZzzz

ZZzzz Report 9 Aug 2021 13:49

Excellent. :-D

Dermot

Dermot Report 9 Aug 2021 16:58

Smashing! :-D

Tawny

Tawny Report 9 Aug 2021 18:34

:-D :-D

Allan

Allan Report 9 Aug 2021 22:17

I don't understand it :-0

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 10 Aug 2021 22:06

It took me a couple of attempts for some of them! :-D

Allan

Allan Report 10 Aug 2021 22:59

That's the difference, between us, Maggie; you were being kind, I was being sarcastic ;-) :-D :-D :-D

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 10 Aug 2021 23:15

No, I was being honest! :-D :-D

Allan

Allan Report 10 Aug 2021 23:28

It is, though, an excellent way of teaching the various elements of English grammar :-D

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 10 Aug 2021 23:44

It is! I hadn't heard of some of them - yet can I form an sentence understandable! :-D

Allan

Allan Report 10 Aug 2021 23:48

My grammer's terrible.

She's ill in hospital :-D

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 11 Aug 2021 00:01

:-D :-D :-D