General Chat

Douglas the humble Crab and Kate the Lobster Princess were madly,
deeply and passionately in love. For months they enjoyed an idyllic relationship until one day Kate scuttled over to Douglas in tears.

"We can't see each other any more..." she sobbed.

"Why?" gasped Douglas.

"Daddy says that crabs are too common," she wailed. "He claims you
are a mere crab, and a poor one at that, and crabs are the lowest class of
crustacean and that no daughter of his will marry someone who can only walk
sideways."

Douglas was shattered, and scuttled sidewards away into the darkness
to drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion.

That night, the great Lobster ball was taking place. Lobsters came
from far and wide, dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess
refused to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father's side,
inconsolable.

Suddenly the doors burst open, and Douglas the crab strode in. The
Lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King
Lobster rose from his throne. Slowly, painstakingly, Douglas the
Crab made his way across the floor.......and all could see that he was
walking, not sideways............but FORWARDS.........Yes FORWARDS,
one claw after another!!
Step by step he made his approach towards the throne, until he
Looked the King lobster in the eye.

There was a deadly hush..................................



For quite a while...........................





Finally, the crab spoke.......
















"F*ck, I'm pi$sed."