Genealogy Chat

you are going early any special reason or are you just tired. Goodnight and have pleasant dreams of your next money making venture.

Yes, I have a fixation Val. LOL, you mean my reply to your thread on General Board re the big boobed one? I guess we have the same sort of interests Val. (and I dont mean big boobs) But Im off to bed now, so you can relax.

are you stalking me Heather ???? only joking. Yes Men arent good at communicating are they.

Very pleased for you Val. And I think you are right, men just dont seem to get around to getting in touch and arent very good at chatting anyway are they. They probably debate for ages over what to do and then take the easy way out and do nothing.

sorry to hear that, maybe you told him too much to take in in one go, Men arent as forthcoming as Women I have found, I contacted a Cousin he sounded thrilled to be in touch even rang me , but he never wrote or rang again.I think Men are generally lazier at this sort of thing , especially younger ones.

Finding someone that is alive can be very exciting - and upsetting at times. I managed to trace my Aunt (Dads sister) death. Sent for the cert and saw that the informant was her Son, my Cousin- who i had never heard of before. I looked him up in the telephone directory and there he still was, living in his Mums old address that was on the death cert. I debated if i should telephone him and decided in the end it might come as a bit of a shock or he might think i was some crank, so i wrote to him, telling all about the family and that my Dad lost touch with his siblings when he remarried after my Mum died and his was the first 'living cousin' i knew i had. Despite the fact i enclosed a s.a.e. he ignored me. So after all the excitement i came down to earth with a bump. Wish in some ways i had never found him. Maureen

Thanks everyone for your input - I'm now serioiusly considering the idea of taking the plunge Carole

Athena I too have found that my family feuded for what now seem the silliest of reasons. Two branches of my family never spoke and in fact never even mentioned each other. It was only when I started doing this that I found them and a descendant told me the reason - there had been a scandalous divorce in 1930 something, and my 'respectable' branch cut off all contact with the other side. On another branch, a daughter was cut off from the rest of her family, who were staunch Methodists because she married a man who was C of E. How sad and silly. OC

that's really great news Valerie, just shows how it pays to chase up any leads however remote, what have you got to lose?

Carole - sounds like you've had a similar find to me. I would say you have nothing to lose by making contact. The worse that could happen is that they say they are not interested... Years ago, people hushed things up over the silliest of reasons. I discovered that the reason my grandad's family hid the fact he had an older half-sister was because she was born from their father's first marriage - and then when the first wife died he married again to a woman half his age! There was so much stigma attached to the fact that his wife was only a few years younger than his daughter that everyone covered up the fact that she was his daughter. His son's by second marriage grew up thinking their sister was an aunt (until very late in life they found out) and she never disclosed to her own children that the old man they visited was their grandfather! They called him 'Uncle'. So, a very mixed up family - but thank goodness we are all sorted and back on an even keel! My mum's new cousin, who is 70yrs, said it has given her a new lease of life! So, sometimes going with your gut instinct and making contact with someone can really prove worthwhile.

I was thinking about my gran's funeral - granddad was there, the one and only time in my life I saw him. I have memories of both sides of the family glaring at each other. That's what I find off putting. I'd like to find out first if there was a serious problem

yes Athena it can work out quite well, Sometimes they are as pleased as we are to have been found.

Carole what can you lose, go for it just keep the letter simple , I usually start with who I am and that I am researching the family Tree,and I understand if they dont want to be in touch but would they please put a yes or no in the Stamped addressed Envelope I always supply,just so I know its the right person. So far everybody has answered I have even had a Man ring me and say he is sorry we arent related because I sound so nice, how about that then.

Brilliant when that happens, isn't it? I found an unknown first cousin of my mum's by tracing the informant from the death cert of my mum's previously-unheard-of aunt (it was all a hushed up secret from long ago - my grandad never mentioned he had a sister). Now we are all in touch and my mum's elderly cousin (who was the informant on the cert) is really thrilled to discover she has new family, just as we are!

Morning Merry, I dont like to let things drop I am afraid I am a stickler, I must say I was amazed to get a phone call I always put a Stamped addressed Envelope in so they can just write no or yes to any contact.So was hoping for a letter at least but this was much better, especially when they said they had been trying to find him (my Husband) for years too.

That's nice Valerie I'm in the same position but umming and ahhing what to do about it. I think Derek has found my half aunty - I didn't know about - informant on my grandfather's death cert. Trouble is I think there is some sort of bad feeling in the family I can't get to the bottom of.

Ooooh, well done for following everything through!! Merry

about 3 weeks ago I asked Derek for a Electoral Roll look up , for my Husbands Father who he had not seen for 40 odd years, he did not find him listed but did find his Death , I received the Death Cert yesterday ,wrote to the informant who was his Step Sister , and today got a Phone call from her and her Daughter.They have so much info about him including lots of Photos and stuff. So if you do have an informant who may still be alive go for it , you never know.