Genealogy Chat

Tim I once gave some advice on here to a Newbie which went something like this: When you have Fred Bloggs marriage cert, it will tell you either his father is Jim Bloggs or someone else. The reply was But my Grandfather isnt called Fred Bloggs. OC

I'm beginning to feel left out here ... you lot are all apparently cousins through Fred Bloggs ... why isn't he in my tree??!! Tim

I must have been very lucky not to have had any treenapping attempts or persistent no-hopers. It never ceases to amaze me the number of people who say 'I've got a Fred Bloggs just like you - have a look at my tree'. I do generally take up the offer of a free look but then delete the contact as soon as I've told them it doesn't compute. In the end it's your choice - if in doubt don't release your tree, especially if it's got living people in it. Gullible GR folk could be a target for identity theft as well.

Like a lot of people i haven't gone mad ordering every cert for every name in my tree,but the birth certs for all my mums siblings are just about in place.Then the certs for my direct line,birth and marriage,plus bmd refs for any that i haven't as yet obtained. What really annoys me is when someone who connects into my tree just three generations back wants all the bumph about from me,but can't even prove their grandparents properly. 'I see you have Fred Smith born 1890 he is brother to my granny Elsie,she was born about 1895 in Cornwall.....' Was she really?My findings show that Cornwall is big and a lot of Elsie births occured about 1895...........And Fred didn't have a sister called Elsie that i can find. Glen

Perhaps when people join GR the powers that be instead of leaving them to it could send them a mail pointing out some facts regarding the site with a few warnings, 'treenapping' being one of them. I know that they have sections on the left side of the screen, but it would appear few people read these before starting and I cannot recollect seeing any warnings regarding trees. JoJo

I've lost count of the number of times a conversation goes like this (abbreviated, as my typing is rubbish!): Them......I have a John Brown....is he yours too? Me: I have 7 John Browns....please could you give some info about yours? Them: He is my gramps. Me: guessing you therefore mean either the one born 1900 in Lesser Mongolia or the one born 1906 in Peckham......their details are (give some info)........ Them: Oh, that isn't right....my granny was Mavis Snodgrass, not the wives you mention Me: Never mind....happy Hunting Them: (THE CRUNCHER!!). Show me your tree anyway, just in case I can see another link. Me: No reply! Merry

I had a bad experiance recently, although not because I had opened my tree. I found someone on my hot matches, who matched with all my grandma's brothers and sister, 14 in all. I was quite excited, thinking that she must be related to one of them. However it turns out that she was distantly related to the husband of my great aunt. I was disappointed, but pointed her in the direction of 2 cousins who she would be connected to. I got a message back, saying that she had already been in contact with them, that's where she got her info from and she still wanted to view my tree! She gave me access to her tree and I can see that she has copied my cousin's tree, not only my grandma & siblings but also their parents and grandparents! Then, when I was contacting a webite relating to my gg grandmother's family, to give them info on her, I found that they alreay had the info from this woman, who was totally unconnected! I was fuming.! Lynn

thanks all feel better now and now to bed cu tommorow good luck all john

John I got caught out by a really nasty scam artist... I had a connection came through.. and they gave me a tree back to the 1400's.... It seemed genuine at first until I started to check out the info that was supplied.... It was a very nasty hoax which I still reel from... I am wary of connections on here..now....even lately I have given permission to view my tree to a connection and the whole of my tree has appeared on his with additions that are not right...I leave some very important bits off my tree on here... but do have it in my personal file.. MO

I agree with Christine and Old Crone and unfortunately its something most learn the hard way. I still get excited when I find a connection to my rellies and am delighted to share but most of the help I get is from others on this board. Sad world we live in Yvonne

Totally agree with Christine - just about all my new info comes from the fantastic looker uppers on this Board, very very little from any contact - and most of THAT turns out to be wrong. I dont open my tree to anyone. Ever. If I think they deserve it, I dribble the info out bit by bit and tell them where they can look, if they want to do it faster than I am prepared to release it. We often have a thread on this subject, and somewhere, a Newbie will pop up and say - I open my tree to anyone, I thought that's what this Site is about, sharing. And then, when someone steals their tree, they find that actually, it hurts! OC

I think we have all been there John!! I now ask if the person they are matching is part of their main branch, and how they fit in, or if it is just a twig, married to someones sibling etc, and then from there just send the info that is relevent. Having said that, I still get caught by name collectors from time to time. I hate it when 'my family' appears on hotmatches when I know they have little relationship to the submitter! I have to say that I have received little new information from contacts, but have given heaps away! Most of my valuable new info has come from wonderful people on here looking stuff up for me. Christine in NZ

John Sorry this has happened to you - gutting isn't it? But rest assured I think most people have fallen for it - once, but once is enough. Just be ready with the answers next time anyone asks you to open your tree!! Snowdrops

John it only took me a month before someone had my tree, mistakes and all. Now everything is on my personal program, and if anyone proves they belong on it (and they are friendly) I'll send a gedcom or the peice they are missing. It's a pain having to vet people, but when your kids and grandkids end up on Hot Matches and the person won't reply, you have to do something. Good Luck.

Joking aside i'm with the FTM brigade. If someone contacts me through GR and can prove a connection,then i will send that branch of the family via a family group report,i get far more detail in a far more user friendly programme that i can send/print/save for a rainy day. The other advantage is that if you have say John Smith as your 3xg g/f and have traced his sister forwards for a few years,you can just send the sisters details,without revealing all your parents/grandparents etc. Glen

awwwww John not nice, Julie sends 'BIG HUGS' to make you feel bit better!! xx Julie

Tis easy,spell it FTM and order via Heather Positive!! Glen

Glen How do you make A N Other tree please? Pauline

It's not just you,best bet is to use A N Other tree programme,then only release the family line that is the connection. It saves all the hassle,if they know what you do then fair enough,if a little less then good for them,but they don't get everything,(cos you know they will pass it on by the time the next hot matches appear) Glen

John, Try not to worry about it but LEARN from the experience. I am happy to share every drop of information I have, - I will send copies of certs which I have paid for with no thought of return. When I have the time - I spend hours and hours trying to help others who have no connection to me and feel guilty because I am not sorting things for them instantly. (At the same time I am getting behind with my own brick walls). BUT I very rarely open my tree to anyone - I will send reports from my FTM, or type out whatever info I have but you would have to really prove a direct connection and a genuine interest before I would give access to my tree. Sometimes I feel very mean and have to give an apology as I feel guilty as SSoooo many people have given me access to theirs. I think we should all be a lot more careful - Share what you have ? - YES, but don't give access quite so freely. Dea x