Genealogy Chat

My OH born 64 did it the offical way, whilst he was having counselling I went the un-oofical way and found his birth mother one the second phone call. I/we were fortuate enough to know his birth name and his mothers first name and obviously her maiden name and the area that she was living in 64. More fortuate was the fact that she had reverted to her maiden name and still lived in the same area. OH did get his adoption records but they aren't too good - the Catholic home said they didn't collect a lot of information, we did get letters his birth Mum wrote, his medical history whilst in the home. Ours has a very happy ending and 11 years later we still visit his birth Mum and his half brothers on a regular basis, BUT not everyone is so lucky

I actually found my dad thru the phone book, after years of searching!! It was so lucky; he'd asked BT to remove his details so they wouldn't be in the next book (he was getting too many sales calls), and the next book was due out in two weeks. I was on the verge of giving up, and hadn't started my tree then, so didnt know about BMD etc.

The unofficial way, Is virually impossible for an amateur researcher, IF she doesnt know her birth name. Even knowing it, there is still much to be gained by doing it the 'proper way' the service is provided for a reason, and should be used really. Its all well and good saying, she's ready for anything - it can be the hardest thing ever, and often needs the support of those that know where to look for the answers if not provide them. If you are looking to obtain an adoption file without the councilling, the chances are virtually Nil.

Hi Mark. I had to do it the unofficial way so as not to offend. Basically, there are sites like missing you etc etc; BMD for marriages after 1983 (or before 1983 if you're going to be patient and trawl thru them all) because the lady may have married in that time period and therefore changed her surname. (I don't like to say it, but also check the death index too). Friends Reunited and the electoral rolls are free to browse. Persevere with Social Services to get her notes, it'll be worth it. When you get the lady's last known address (ie, the one she gave Social Services), write to that address asking if the present occupier knows where she went. No need to give too many details.

The one advantage I found of going through the official channels--I was adopted in 1951 -is that I was able to apply for a copy of my adoption file.This gave me many interesting facts that I otherwise would have missed including letters from my mum and relevant facts about my dad.Also I got the address of where we'd lived together for 7 months and even details of feeding etc. Such info for me means so much.

Hi all. Ta for all your help/info. Think we`ll be making the first steps this week. Mark

Hi You might like to check out these websites, they will explain how 'her indoors' can start her application for her original birth certificate and access her adoption file. www.gro.gov.uk and click into adoption. www.adoptionsearchreunion.org.uk In regards to searching your selves... this booklet will help. http://www.adoptionsearchreunion.org.uk/NR/rdonlyres/A617B53B-D3B0-4A1A-A5A8-86D22841A4A9/3/familyconnections.pdf Hope this helps. Cheers Gerry Edited because I made a web address error.

If your wife knows her birth name then there is nothing to stop her getting a copy of her birth certificate. However, if she doesn't know her birth name then the only way to find out is via Social Services - people who were adopted before 1975 have to have counselling before they can access their adoption records, partly to prepare them for what they might uncover, and partly to protect the rights of the birth mother, who was promised absolute and lifelong anonymity. If you enter ADOPTION in the search box at the top of this board, you will come up with numerous threads on this subject which you may find helpful to read before you do anything else. OC

Evevning all. Right then. 'She who thinks she is being obeyed' (errr, sorry, I meant My DARLING wife) was adopted at birth back in the mid 1960`s. Following the death of her adopted mother late last year she has decided to try to trace/contact her Birth Mother. I/we realise that the internet has changed the way that things CAN be done (ie there is an official way, and there is an unoffishul way (ie our way)), and we were wondering if anyone has any tips for doing things EITHER way. In particular the sort of information we are after is can we get a copy of her birth certificate from the reg office without having to go through Social Services (or whoever). Any links for websites with advice/legal info would be a great help too. Ta Mark (and Jude too!!!)