Genealogy Chat

Thanks for all the lovely messages, I appreciate that she probably had no choice at that time. We have managed to find some leads such as when she married etc but are struggling to find her now.

Going to Edinburgh tomorrow to continue searching so hopefully will find out more. We only want to find out circumstances now eg is she married, other children, is she still alive? I think he needs time to allow all the information to sink in before he decides to take things further. He says becoming a parent for the first time and also he turns "40" this year is making him think more about the circumstances surrounding his birth.

Kind Regards

Diane

Hello Diane,

People had many reasons for giving up children, your partner should not feel rejected. IT IS NOT HIS FAULT, IT IS THE SYSTEM & THE ERA. Surely it is more imprtant to concentrate on the future of your child, and probably children, than the problems of the past.

I'm an adoptee, and have been lucky enough to find my birth mother after a lot of years searching. She had no choice but to give me up, unless she wanted to end up homeless, who knows how many more sad stories are out there?

Believe me Diane's partner, none of this is your fault, think about your future and that of your daughters, and hopefully children to come.

Go see the agencies - any information is better than none. Think of your future!

Best wishes, hope you pull through this
Mac

At that time, natural parents were given to understand that when babies were given up for adoption, they had no rights to any future contact. The law later changed giving adopted children the right to seek their natural parents.

Counselling is recommended for both natural parents and for adoptive children. Your partner found it too emotional to speak to the adoption service, and that is very understandable. He may fear rejection, apart from anything else, that, too, is understandable, and so may the natural parent; also, she may have a completely different life now, perhaps with a partner or husband and children, and it is possible that no one knows that she had an illegitimate child. Please do seek intermediary help. I wish you well.

It is my Partner who is adopted. At this stage we only want to know very basic information eg medical information as we had a baby last year and she has suffered a few health problems.

We know there was no Father on the birth certificate and were initially told adoption was due to the parents going to University. We have now found that birth Mum was actually 25 when she gave birth so highly unlikely it was due to education, especially in 1971.

Adoption was done through Church of Scotland and records are held in Edinburgh. We have went to Edinburgh and got birth extract but my Partner found it too emotional to go speak with Scottish Adoption Service.

My concern is he will "be rejected" as the adoption has left him with insecurities. He is happy for me to see what I can find in the meantime.

Question...

What is known of the circumstances behind the adoption?

Is it your history or someone elses?

FMP stands for Find My Past used by many members on GR

Sorry what is FMP????

Birth Mother was born in 1945 adoption was 1971.

Another thought, have you searched records for England/Wales for a marriage and later children, or looked for possible emigration?

I'm not sure what sort of year we're talking about, but FMP has searchable marriages as well as births now - if you don't have an ancestry sub. You also have the dob so someone with the right sub. could search deaths.

If you still don't get anywhere try posting up a marriage/death search request without giving the persons details - that way someone with the necessary subscription may offer to do look-ups for you by PM.

I'd hesitate at the newspaper appeal - consider her situation now, and what her past holds ( you) and how open she has been with the truth with current family.

What sort of time frame are we looking at?

Have you thought about asking the local newspaper to look for her

I've only ever searched England and the records are not on-line you have to go to the local records office or library - some also offer a look-up service. You should be able to find where the records are held by googling.

I assume you have tried Ancestry trees as well? Also try googling the names & birth years of the mother/grandparents surprising what comes up sometimes - which is why most people try to avoid giving too much detail about living people on these boards!

The birth Mother was 25 at the time of birth. Can I check electoral rolls online?

Yes I have searched on here with no joy.

If you have the birth certificate for the child there should be an address - you could try searching the electoral rolls from that year forward to see when they moved. If the birth mother was of age, she should be shown and you may be able to establish when she left home.

If this involves an adoption, there should be an adoption file which the child can access - not sure of the proceedure in Scotland, but in England you are given access to it when requesting your original birth certificate.

Have you tried searching trees on here to see if anyone has the family members on their tree?

Hi, I would be obliged for any help seeking birth family in Scotland. I have got details of birth mother and now have her birth certificate. I also now know her parents names and the address at which she was born. I got some information from Scotlands People but cannot find any details of marriages, deaths or any other children born.
I have tried friends reunited, facebook and 192.com. I really don't know how to proceed with my search now, any advice greatly appreciated.

Kind Regards

Diane